Sunday, February 2, 2014

New Domain! is now up and running! All future reviews will be posted there, and all past toy reviews will be back-posted.

I hope to see you there,

Friday, January 24, 2014

Finger Claws

For today's review, I'll be looking at Finger Claws by Agreeable Agony. As always, click any image for a larger version!

 Closer as pinpoint, further as dual-sensation:
 Dual scratch:

I really, really love scratching things.1 If you're not into scratching, you should check out an Agreeable Agony candle or rope kit instead.2 If you are though, these claws absolutely rock. Made of brass or stainless steel depending on your preference, these can be easily molded to your (or a friend's) exact finger tip size with pliers.

Sensation-wise, these claws can as easily tickle as they can leave raised marks. As the tips are slightly curved, far more pressure is required than one would expect to break skin. Depending on where you rest the claw, and the length of your nails, changes play. With shorter nails or the claw set close enough to your nail bed so your nail is covered before the metal tapers, the person getting scratched will only feel the claw's tip, and thus get sensitized to its pinpoint location. Worn this way with the claw as the only focal point, far more pain can be felt. With longer nails, or the claws set far back enough that when angling them downwards both the finger nail and claw scratch skin, is the second option. I preferred this method as the dual sensation of a wider scrape followed by a sharp scratch is lovely. Either method can include the cool metal band making contact first, followed by a finger tip, and then the claw(s).

The Finger Claws make for a lovely accessory at any kinky event, especially one with a later play party. These are also great backup claws for reducing the need of long nails for scratching. Cleaning for either the brass claws or stainless steel claws can be done with rubbing alcohol. Be sure to clean before and after use.

1 My patronus would be a cat/dragon hybrid.
2 Or use them as kitten scratchers and miniature pope hats (which go well with Divine Intervention toys).

Grade Breakdown: 97

Value: 5/5
$10 per claw
free shipping within the US

Aesthetics: 17/20
These are a little too minimalist for my taste.

Pleasure: 75/75
Intended Functionality: 5/5
Reusability: 20/20
Easily cleaned,
great for marking up someone to spicing up a massage.
Best Functionality: 50/50
The dual sensation scratches
with two claws is the best.

Thanks Agreeable Agony!
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FTC: Agreeable Agony provided Sex Toy Review Land with two Finger Claws free of charge for an honest review. Though links have been used,  this has not altered any of my opinions stated within the review, and does comply with the FTC.

Thursday, January 23, 2014

Cosmic Bear

For today's review, I'll be looking at Cosmic Bear by Nature Lovin' Lubricants. As always, click any image for a larger version!

Right after being under light:
 ~10 minutes later (still glowing, but not as vibrant green):

Glow-in-the-dark lube sounds like perfection- glowing genitals, glowing toys, and the perfect addition to any sci-fi role play.1 Though the concept is glorious, the product did not deliver quite enough glowing for my taste.

The lube itself is fairly squishy, and has a faint odor. Taste-wise it's very close to neutral, with a touch of sourness. This lube does have a bit of grittiness to it that becomes more apparent when using orally. For this reason, I would not recommend this lube for anal play. I found this lube a bit reminiscent of Sliquid Sea, and was pleasantly surprised as this easily could have been a gambit lube, with terrible quality excused by its novelty factor. This is a water-based lube, and can be used with any toys, such as: wood, latex, and rubber. It's easily washed off with soap and water, and is non-staining.

Ingredients: Deionized Water, Zinc Sulfide Copper Doped, Propylene Grycol, Carragenan, Hydroxy Ethyl Cellulose Gum, Sodium Lactate, Citric Acid, Carbomer, Sodium Benzoate, Potassium Sorbate, Dimethyl Polysiloxane, L-lysine Hydrochloride

There is a tiny amount of silicone in this lube, so if using with silicone be sure to test it on a toy's base first. I haven't had it react with a silicone toy yet, and the silicone gives the lube a nice glide. There isn't any information on the type of carbomer used, though otherwise all the ingredients are safe. Regardless, before using test a bit of lube on your thigh or wrist for any reactions. 

The glowing is a lovely bright green, and it can be refreshed with bright light. If you're not moving, and have a layer of lube down, you'll glow for a long period of time, and it'll be fantastic.2 Also as one would expect, the thicker or more blob-like, the longer and stronger it glows. However, if you begin to actually use the Cosmic Bear as a lubricant, and rub around, the glowing goes away even if you shine light on it. I automatically rub lube, so when I want to glow for more than ten seconds, I go through a lot. As the glowing factor is the deciding point, I advise thinking about how you enjoy using lube to determine if it's worth it.

1 I unfortunately have yet to get two cock-owners to slather their genitals and sword fight while making lightsaber noises.
2 Coolest moment was definitely looking down at my glowing green vulva. I'm an alien!

Grade Breakdown: 73

Value: 4/5
$20 for 6 oz.

Aesthetics: 20/20
On purely aesthetic grounds,
this lube nails it.

Pleasure: 49/75
Intended Functionality: 1/5
Only worked as glowing or as a lube.
Reusability: 3/20
I went through this like water.
Best Functionality: 45/50
As an artistic awesome alienish glow,
and then after as a lubricant.

Thanks Nature Lovin' Lubricants!
facebook ~ twitter

FTC: Nature Lovin' Lubricants provided Sex Toy Review Land with the Cosmic Bear free of charge for an honest review. Though links have been used, this has not altered any of my opinions stated within the review, and does comply with the FTC.  

Tuesday, January 7, 2014

Wax Play Candle Pack

For today's review, I'll be looking at Uberkinky's Wax Play Candle Pack. As always, click any image to see a larger version!

On fire:
Color dipped:
Wax close up:
 Amount burned during drippings photographed:
 Two-thirds through removal:

These candles are made of a paraffin wax that melts around 130-135 degrees. Though this is cooler than dining room candles, which are likely to burn, these aren't quite as cool as some candles specifically made for wax play.1 The paraffin also ensures that you can flip the candle upside down with minimal soot forming, over one particularly twisty session, I only counted three specks. Due to the design of these candles, they work best for creating droplets or splatters rather than pouring lines.

These candles are color dipped, rather than solid, and you can see the effect this had on the wax. I found this to be a great aesthetic disappointment, as I was looking forward to the sharp contrast of the red and black. Like any candles, the further the wax falls before hitting skin the cooler it will be, and vice-versa. Varying the distance between skin and candle is an easy way to keep things interesting. Do keep in mind though that it is harder to aim the further away you get, and completely avoid any negatively-sensitive areas. Wax play also conveniently works well with other kinks, especially knife play, predicament bondage, and flogging. Though obviously these candles can't be used underwater, they can give rubber duckies a run for their money during bath time. Hot wax on a body chilled by the air, but warmed by water is a rather awesome sensation. These candles were the perfect temperature for bath play.

These candles drip quite a bit, and can last through multiple sessions. Above I have their first use photographed with the amount of wax used and how far the candles burned down. Removal is fairly easy and painless if the wax is only one or two drops deep. If however you covered a part with more than that, removal will tug on both skin and hair (though it won't remove any). These candles were shipped in clear bag and surrounded with bubble wrap. If you're not a stickler for aesthetics, then these are the candles for you.

If you're new to wax play, Uberkinky has a lovely beginner's guide here!

1I am a spoiled brat and prefer my wax play at exactly 124 degrees.

Grade Breakdown: 87

Value: 4/5
The more you buy, up to five,
the less the per unit price is.

Aesthetics: 9/20
If these were pure red and black,
they would have been so much more awesome.

 Pleasure: 74/75
Intended Functionality: 5/5
Reusability: 19/20
Though they are finite,
they last a very long time.
Best Functionality: 50/50
It's a toss up between flogging it off someone,
or completely covering a body part with this wax.
Thank you Uberkinky!

FTC: Uberkinky provided Sex Toy Review Land with the Wax Play Candle Pack free of charge for an honest review. Though links have been used, this has not altered any of the opinions stated within the review, and does comply with the FTC.